the new year

I am exhausted but I cannot sleep.  I have worked on my painting, completed assembling 2 drawers of my new 6-drawer dresser, downloaded a shitload of music, and pondered the meaning of life.  Now it's 2:00 in the morning... the morning of the first day back at school since the 2 week break... and I cannot sleep.  No need to mention that I have to "wake up" for school in 4 hours... although I just did...

So at the moment I'm listening to some good old Damien Rice.  Chill-out kind of music.  No doubt everyone else is probably asleep so they're not deadbeat-tired for school.  I still need to finish the doll I'm making for my friend.  I should be finishing the doll.  But just...one more day.

Today marks the beginning.  The beginning of my new life, my new goals, my new aspirations and accomplishments.  Today marks the first day of a long journey to my success and to my happiness.  It won't be an easy one but I am hell-bent on getting there.  I can be someone.  Someone important.  Someone other people want to be around and look up to.  A good role model.  A good friend.  Someone with a portfolio of accomplishments.  Creativity, imagination, freedom, movement.  I can be someone.  Someone happy.

By the way I don't have a weigh-in because the scale isn't working.  I'll write in some numbers as soon as possible.

Also I love this quote: "Starve my pain away, make me beautiful, make everything ok, turn my problems into bone, crush them up, gather the remains, blow away the dust."

Oh and by the way here are my new years resolutions:
1. weigh 95 lbs
2. go on pointe
3. be in the nutcracker
4. paint 1 painting a month
5. draw a comic
6. learn blender program and create 3D animation
7. start youtube video blog
8. write a book
9. read and finish 1 book a week
10. practice flute 1 hour a day (practice at least 5 days a week)
11. keep room clean
12. work harder at school
13. get a job
14. eat less
15. exercise more
         -10 min constant running, every three days increase 1 min (at least 4 times a week)
         -100 sit-ups a day
         -50 push-ups a day
         -stretch every day
         -3 sets of 30 sec back-bridge-bends.

 And last: you are all beautiful <3