Ridding Myself Of Excess

Do you know what I do when no one is home?  I reach the dark corners of a box and sink down until tears fall from my face and two fingers are forced into my throat while my stomach filled to the brim wastes away into liquid emptiness.  I do it until I cannot anymore.  Could anyone know that I am vacantly ridding myself of excess.  And who would think to stop and detect the glimpse of fading that reassigns itself to different parts of my day.  Who could vaguely realize that I, myself, am wasting away.  And that until my physical appearance alters to something that begins to worry, no one will notice.  How small do the numbers have to get before someone notices.  How much do you think I can get away with. 

I have purged 3 times in the last 4 days.  No one is ever home.  Tomorrow I will not eat.  No food will pass these lips.  Water is all I am allowed.  I must be strict with myself.  If I cannot do this, what am I worth?

I hope my boyfriend never gains knowledge of this disgusting secret.
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I love this song - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1q8s58mK-Cs
...and this one - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nN5pOK6y42o

Life is a dream and ignorance is fueled by nightmares.

It gives me identity.  It gives me bones.  It gives me air.  What am I.